Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but finding peace deep within it.

Saleswomen hold up an ugly dress and say "It looks much better on."  On what?  On fire?

You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.  –  Stephen King

Laugh, and the world laughs with you.  Laugh hysterically, for no apparent reason, and they'll leave you alone.

Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die!

"It matters if you just don't give up."  –  Stephen Hawking

I gave my father $100 and said, "Buy yourself something that will make your life easier."  So he went out and bought a present for my mother.

It's weird that "coward" doesn't mean "toward a cow".

I'm "it's 8:30 and you wanna start a movie this late?" years old.

The only person who had all their work done by Friday, was Robinson Crusoe!